Alice in Jeddah-land

February 20, 2011

In no way whatsoever, am I trying to be rude or disrespectful. If I could take a picture, I would- but obviously I can’t so you get to read about it.

My Saturday morning was as typical as it gets, I was well-rested, energized with not much to do as per usual during the weekend, so it was quite normal.

What I’m trying to say is, I wasn’t seeing things because I really had to spend an hour and a half today with a lady who was a cross between Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter from Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland.

Yes, I liked the movie and adored the book as a child. I was not hallucinating, I am not on any medication, and I am rather healthy hamdila.

Do you know how you meet people who look like birds, turtles, fish or Tim Burton characters in this case. The challenge for me was, I didn’t know where to quite place her. Mad Hatter or Red Queen?

Point is, I think Tim Burton gets his inspiration from real people. Bless him.

 

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I miss blogging!

My only excuse would be that I mentally blog. For me, that makes sense. I haven’t kicked my blogging habit as such, just been busy with so much, esp with the state our Wild Wild East is in. I simply can’t keep up.

Spa days haven’t even cured me. My cries for help to rejuvenate and cleanse my state of mind, soul and totally toxic body thanks to Al Baik, seem like such a waste. My new best friends are Al Jazeera and Diet Pepsi. My defense is, at least it’s Diet.

And yesterday was Valentines Day. Or day before, since it’s past midnight now.

Thing is, you know you’ve integrated into Saudi society, when you schedule an anti-cellulite massage on V-Day and your masseuse is late cz she’s out celebrating Valentines at 5 in the afternoon. Sorry ya3ni, I forgot people still celebrate! What happened with getting arrested for wearing red and selling red anything??

And yes, her massage was quite half-hearted and I felt like shit cz I was on this guilt trip high. Not my fault, it boils down to Internal Organizational Management and shitty communication. Something not uncommon in Jeddah.

That was my Valentines Day. On a merrier note, don’t you jus love the picture?

You know how your week goes by, and there are some conversations you simply can’t stop thinking about…

Here are some of mine.

On the terrible Jeddah floods:

“I’m a rescue diver and I got my certificate from  Sharm Il Sheikh. I once saved a man from drowning and a shark bit me, here you wana see the scar?”

Me: “No thank you”

After the flood….

“The Saudi Civil Defence sent all us divers a text message asking us to join the rescue team”

Me: “Great! Did you go?”

Her: “No, because the water is dirty and I can get diseases”

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On Dubai’s economy:

“Dubai is going down very soon. They are a country built on slavery.”

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On “The King’s Speech” (the movie):

Me: “I’m watching The King’s Speech.”

Her: “Oh he’s back?”

Me: ” Umm I mean the movie”

Her: “How am I supposed to know, all you’ve been talking about these days is politics” ❤ lool love u!

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On Egypt:

“I don’t get why people can’t have a revolution in peace”

B.P

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A tweet on Egypt:

“He’s the King of De-Nial”

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On cellulite:

“Apparently a massage makes you lose cellulite”

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On feminine matters:

“Honey, does it still hurt you when you pms?”

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It’s been one hectic week/ 14 days.

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